Chris can’t fall asleep unless he runs on a treadmill.
Hey Chris, most people with disorders like yours never find a good way to get to sleep. But you already have! Bravo! The problem isn’t falling asleep on the treadmill, it’s what happens when you go crashing down and injure yourself. So what can you do? Chris, the solution is so simple you’re going to kick yourself really hard that you didn’t think of it! Just tie your mattress to your back before you get on the treadmill. You run, you drift off to sleep, you fall on your back, and now you can settle in for eight hours of deep and relaxing sleep. Just remember to take that mattress off your back before you go off to work in the morning! Problem solved!
This is a much common problem in my family history. We have solve this problem quite simply – by simply putting a treadmill vertical up against the north wall of the bedroom – then afix the bed in alignment to said treadmill a legs length away from said treadmill. Thus laying on said bed and legs on said treadmill sart your run – start your run and when you reach aproperate speed – your fall is captured by the bed – it is then like my drinking – get drunk fall down no problem – run no fall no problem.
insincerely yours
mr4rocky
For the man who can’t sleep. Try stapling eyes together. This tends to encourage the closing of the eyes. Hey you gotta start somewhere right. If you find staples a little much, use extra power super glue but hold those eyes really tight until stuck. Both these methods train the eyes to stay shut. Its worked for millions, why not you?
You can take up to 500 mg of magnesium, which is a muscle relaxer, has no side effects, and it will help you sleep. Do not have coffee within TEN hours of going to bed. TEN!!!!! That is how long it takes caffeine to leave your system. I am having fun on this site!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!